When it comes to enjoying life’s great pleasures, both sex and food are at the top of our list of priorities. Both are sensory experiences, where the senses play a key role in intensifying emotions, connections and intimate moments. From the texture of a well-cooked dish to the feel of your partner’s skin, gastronomy and sexual pleasure share more than we imagine.
Sharing a meal with someone can be one of the most effective ways to strengthen intimacy in a couple. Valérie Tasso, psychologist, sexologist comments that “when a couple comes for a consultation because they feel something is not right, there is one key question I often ask: ‘Do you eat together?’ This simple act reveals deep aspects of intimacy and sharing. Thus, eating together can be much more relevant than it seems, being a space for connection and shared reflection.
This ritual of sharing a meal allows couples to disconnect from the outside world and focus on their relationship, so the atmosphere also plays a crucial role. As cooking expert Camino López comments, it is the key to any intimate experience: “Low lights envelop everything in a softness that instantly relaxes. Soft music relaxes the muscles, and suddenly, it’s just you, the food and the company.”
However, the simple act of eating with our partner does not increase our libido. Valerie Tasso points out that “it will depend on each of us, and whether it is the first time we share a meal/dinner with him or if it is several times”. In this sense, the first time the feeling that usually invades us, as a general rule, is that of some modesty, some shyness and intimidation and that is usually a barrier when thinking about sex or imagine ourselves in intimacy with our ‘crush’.
“The desire to have sex will appear rather in another encounter, when we get to know this ‘crush’ better. But, I repeat, everything will depend on each person, obviously,” she clarifies.
Aphrodisiac foods, reality or myth?
Although eating does not always serve as intimacy or libido enhancement, what we eat can increase our sexual desire. We cannot talk about gastronomy and sexuality without mentioning aphrodisiac foods. For many, certain ingredients such as chocolate or oysters have an almost magical reputation when it comes to awakening desire. However, Camino López has a more pragmatic view: “More than for their ‘magical’ properties, it is for the psychological and sensory effect they generate. Ingredients such as chocolate release endorphins, while the spiciness literally quickens the pulse.”
Dr. Silvia Cintrano has the same opinion: “Although there are no foods that ‘per se’ generate an increase in sexual desire or activate arousal, we have a mind that is capable of eroticizing almost any stimulus.
In this sense, Camino López comments that the following foods can help us with sexual desire:
1. Chocolate: “Who can resist cocoa? Chocolate is not only delicious, it also stimulates the production of endorphins, those ‘happiness hormones’ that put you in a good mood. If you add to that a little bit of mystery and seduction? The effect is double!” she says.
2. Oysters: According to Camino Lopez, they may not be the most photogenic, “but oysters are rich in zinc, which they say awakens desire and stimulates testosterone. Besides, eating an oyster has something of a ritual about it… and every ritual has its mystique, right?
Honey: since ancient times, honey has been associated with love, and it’s no coincidence: it’s sweet, sticky and natural. Did you know that the term honeymoon comes from here? It used to be believed that a teaspoon of honey a day would make any couple happy. Says the expert, it contains boron, a mineral that helps regulate estrogen and testosterone levels, giving the love hormones a boost. “Plus, it’s a quick source of energy, perfect for revitalizing the body and boosting mood,” she explains.
4. Avocado: its creamy texture and mild flavor are just the beginning. “The Aztecs already called it ‘the fruit of love’ (note that in Nahuatl it means ‘testicle’!). It has good fats that improve mood and energy… and from there to other things, it’s just a step!” says Camino.
5. Cinnamon: that sweet and spicy touch is like a perfume for the senses. Cinnamon contains cinnamic aldehyde, a compound that improves blood circulation and helps regulate blood sugar levels, raises body temperature and even seems to give life to the blood. A dash in coffee, and wham, you have a love potion disguised as a drink.
Food as a sexual element
Using food in sexual experiences is a more than recurrent practice in many couples. Who has not seen in a movie scene how chocolate or cream is used for games? A neutral stimulus, such as ice, whose function is to cool a drink, could be used in sexual games and take an erotic turn. The same goes for certain foods. “To achieve eroticization of food, attention must be paid to the whole context: a seductive company, an intimate and comfortable atmosphere, the expectations of what motivates the moment… in addition to the food that is appetizing. All this generates a series of associations that facilitate the perception of the experience as an erotic stimulus”, justifies Silvia Cintrano.
Among the sexual practices that combine both pleasures, sploshing stands out. This practice involves using food as part of sexual play, as described by Valérie Tasso: “It consists of smearing your partner with food of different textures, colors and flavors. This practice has roots in antiquity, but is still very popular. It is a real art that requires both sexual and culinary talent.”
Its origin comes from an erotic magazine from the late 1980s called Splosh! which had erotic content in which men and women used to find themselves in situations that were the least bit slimy, such as oil, eggs, pasta… The magazine disappeared in 2001, but its name (which is an onomatopoeia for the noise that food makes when it falls on the body) was kept for an erotic practice that is also known as WAM, an acronym for Wet and Messy fetishism.
“It is interesting to know that, at the beginning, it was one of the practices that were part of the erotics of B.D.S.M (Bondage-Discipline, Domination-Submission, Sadomasochism), because of the connotation of ‘filth’ and a certain ‘humiliation’ that sploshing usually presents. This is no longer the case because it has become very democratized by going viral,” says Valérie Tasso.
“Like any erotic practice we want to try, the important thing is communication with the partner and what we are willing to do and what we are not (setting limits). That doesn’t mean there’s no room for improvisation. But always with head,” concludes the expert.
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Beleida Delgado
